22 Jan 2005

Had trouble sleeping last night. Didn’t get much sleep. Been having my period since yesterday. It always happens—cramps, lethargy, lost of appetite, water retention…….. I don’t know whether I should hate it or be grateful to know that I’m actually fertile. Doesn’t matter anyway, not planning to have kids. After witnessing an actual delivery, it just traumatized me. I wouldn’t want to go through that kind of pain. :(
Went to the market with my grandma and aunt. There are 2 markets, 1 is the Tsuen Wan market and another 1 the Yeung Uk Market a little further down. We went to Yeung Uk Market, it’s my grandma’s routine to buy her fishes from that market. And I bought egg tarts on our way back. It was really good!! Yum!! J
Even though grandma can’t see clearly, she insists that she prepares proper home cooked meals for me as I’ve been away from home for quite some time. She never let me help her in the kitchen. She even tries to shoo me out if I tried to do anything!!All I can do is just stand next to her and observe how she prepare for meals or just simply talk to her.
I watched her as she does everything with sheer concentration. She’s devoted her life to care for her family. I can’t help but feel sad. She’s old and lonely. Sometimes, forgotten by her family as they all carry on with their lives. She may nag and complain at times but I really think all she needs is just a bit more care and attention from everyone. She loves going to the market, guess the hustle bustle of the streets is more exciting then staying at home watching TV. Oh, and 1 thing, she still treat me as if I’m a kid even though I’m already 22!!